Strong Enough for the Chaos

by Jamyn Wilson

Jamyn is a mother of four children and Upbeat Barre instructor at the Parker Recreation Center

I didn’t start exercising to get my body “back.” I started because I needed myself back.

After having my third baby, postpartum depression didn’t arrive loudly. It crept in quietly – through exhaustion, foggy head space and a version of myself I didn’t recognize. I felt distant from the mom and wife I wanted to be, or rather, I needed to be. I love my family deeply, but I didn’t feel like I was fully there. I knew something had to change, but the idea of intense workouts or strict diets and routines felt overwhelming.

Then I found Upbeat Barre.

Upbeat, music-filled, low impact barre classes became a lifeline. Not because they were easy – but because they were joyful. For an hour, I could move, sweat, and breathe freely, without pressure, without kids hanging on my legs, in a room full of others, maybe more similar to me than I think. I didn’t need to be perfect. I just had to show up. That small act of showing up turned into momentum. Momentum turned into confidence. And confidence slowly pulled me out of the fog.

Exercise didn’t “fix” everything – but it gave me something powerful: a way to reconnect with my body and my mind.

Over time, my “why” shifted. I wasn’t working out for a number on the scale or a mirror reflection. I was working out for my kids.

I exercise so I can jump on the trampoline without getting winded, or yes, peeing my pants. Or so I can scoop up my heavy toddler and place him in his high bunk bed, or so I can carry laundry baskets upon laundry baskets that never seem to end up and down the stairs, so we can play tag, go on walks, hold my baby on my hip and not think twice about it. My health journey isn’t only for me, it’s for them.

I train for real life – the messy, loud, beautiful chaos of motherhood.

Being strong means being present. It means saying yes more often. Yes to piggyback rides, yes to dance parties in the kitchen, yes to kickball at the park, yes to being the “fun mom” who isn’t watching from the sidelines.

I’ve learned that health doesn’t have to be extreme or all-consuming. It can look like consistent movement you actually enjoy. It can look like choosing strength over exhaustion. It can look like taking care of yourself so you can take care of others better.

Motherhood asks so much of our bodies. Choosing to move – whether it’s barre, lifting, walking, yoga, stretching – isn’t selfish. It’s an act of love. Love for ourselves, and love for the little people who depend on us.

For 2026, I may not always feel put-together. But I feel capable. And strong enough for the chaos.